Out of my way, I'm Beyonce.

Zurich Tram, 2015

I don't usually push people out my way. But there are days when I have had enough of people with no manners. I am on way to class and the tram pulls up. I see people coming off and some lady standing right by the door just blocking people. Lady, take one step back and let people through. If you are having a bad day, so be it, but you can cha cha your way to the back. After seeing people pushing around to get out and pushing around her to get in. I come in. Yes, watch out because today is a day on no patience. The guy in front of me squeezes himself around her. I say entschuldigung, and don't you dare pretend you cannot hear me. Nothing? Ok no problem. Let me push my way through with my huge back pack while the tram does a turn and you unbalance yourself from my side push. Fumbling, feet tied. No more entschuldigung for you. I forgot that I am not Beyonce and I cannot really do these sorts of things... I am sorry, but get it together!

Pretzel Mission

Cheap grocery store, 2015

At some cheap grocery store I go in, I end up scanning all the rows and walking to the snack corner. Obviously. I cannot seem to find the pretzels I want. A guy passes by to go to the cash and then turns around and starts talking to me in German. I reply back I don't understand (and in my head thinking.. I need to obviously concentrate on these pretzels, stop distracting me). So he switches to English and holds out a bottle of red wine. And asks me, "Uh do you know if this is red wine?" I stare at him because I figure he is not serious.. until I realize he maybe is. I say yes.. even the little picture of purple grapes on the label show you it is red wine. "Ok, thanks" and I think  he is about to leave, but of course this cannot be the end of the story.

"I have never seen you around here."

"Around the grocery store? Sometimes I come to buy food. When I am hungry."

"Yeah, are you new?"

"Not really." Still concentrating on pretzels, friend. Go away.

"Cool, are you a student?"

"No, I work..." Go away.

"Ok, did you come here by yourself?"

"No, my husband came here first and I came after. I brought my two kids _____ and _____ with me. They are in kindergarten."

"Ok."

"Ok.."

"BYYYEEEE" Pretzels found.

Line up. He comes after and is behind me, but then lets another guy go in front of him.

All I wanted was pretzels. Leave me alone.

I need a sandwich, and now.

November 2015

Heading back home after work. I see a car parked in front on the sidewalk in front of me. It is dark, the lights inside his car are on. I assume perhaps he is waiting for someone to come out of the apartment, someone to pick up. Or he is checking his phone. Or checking for directions. As I pass by quickly, all I see is him opening a package of cheese slices. Sometimes, you need to swerve to the side of the road to just eat some cheese or make a sandwich. No big deal.